Shit happens but Life has a way of cleaning herself off (the Messy Facials series)

Oh god, please give me some patience to persist further down this road less traveled. And some petty cash along the way for me to stash for a hotel stay in the middle of who knows where the fuck I am.

Living on a Prayer in the Bed of a Stranger

How many of us have been down that path? Ok, so you’re not the big slut I was and maybe a part of me still desires the thrill of spontaneity in my mundane fuckless existence. Oh the joys of a full-time day job. And thank God I got an ass that won’t quit as I work it till I fucking sweat.

You can achieve only that which you allow your mind to believe. And maybe you can kneel down before your choice of neon mega-church gods and hope for a miracle seed of faith. That’s where I am today and many of you may be.

But it’s another day and another opportunity to try something different or shack with someone outside your own comforter zone.

Giving head while getting ahead. The shit we don’t learn in college.

I attended both undergraduate and graduate school; achieving three degrees and sacrificing many sleepless nights with my head in the books (instead of someone’s thighs) or in front of my laptop (instead of getting high). But that was my choice I made early on in life to prove to my own damn self first that I was capable of achieving a goal, even if I didn’t quite know the outcome.

In this life no one owes you shit or that beyond meat crap fattening the stock portfolio of some geek who steal beats his own meat to PornHub. You must earn it and prove to yourself first you have what it takes to play the game. The only other choice you have is to just sit on the bed or fuck your stoned ass all day long with your part-time fast food working partner as you watch others piss cash on top of you.

So start by refocusing your priorities on the best shit that matters and place a higher fuck on your own abilities to make your dream work. But first you must get off your knees, clean your face, and put on a fresh change of clothes. You just can’t lay around naked waiting for God to blow your fucking three some fantasies asunder as that gaping hole under your bedroom swallows you whole.

Just say a little prayer as you light it up. It may be just the cure your sex hangover needs to tweet your relationship status (complicated as fuck) right out the fucking cyber door.

You just gotta have a hemp seed of faith and plant that beautiful ass someplace outside that Uber you’re trying to get to work on time in.

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